Dream Journal
Damon and I were in the airport boarding an airplane to Homer. Sitting near the gate was a girl in her 20s dressed in a pastel skirt suit named Princess [—-]; she was crying about not getting her way. Damon said some mean words to her and we got onto the plane.
Not long after we arrived in Homer, a great catastrophe struck. There were mudslides and houses collapsed for no apparent reason. Most of the inhabitants fled the city, but Damon and I sought refuge with a lot of 10 to 14 year olds in an old abandoned house.
The house didn’t have electricity and all of the blinds were shut. I went around raising the window blinds so that we could see inside, but one of the kids stopped me. He lowered the blinds and tilted them so that there were openings between the slats. It didn’t let in much more light than having them closed, but the boy felt vulnerable with them all the way raised.
We hung out in the house for a few days and ran out of food. We were stuck in the house with nowhere to go and no one to help us. A phone started ringing - we followed the sound to Damon’s coat. I was angry that he had a cell phone and didn’t let us use it to call for help.
He answered it and handed the phone to me (it was a bright lime color). On the other end was Princess [—-]. She told me that she was driving down to help us, but that she wasn’t going to leave Fairbanks until the morning. I pleaded with her to leave sooner so that she could get to us today, but she snootily declined and abruptly hung up.
In the front door walked the pastor’s wife from Fairbanks. She handed me an envelope. I took it, gave her a large hug, and thanked her for coming all that way to rescue us.
She told me that she was just delivering the envelope and had no intention of letting any of us get into her car. I pleaded with her to at least take some of the children, but she refused and quickly left in her dark green blazer.
The house then looked like my parents’ basement. One of the kids, Caitlin, walked in the door shortly after the lady left - Cait lived a short walk from my parents’ house. She was dressed in white and had millions of markers in a white canvas bag hanging from her shoulder. Thinking white was inappropriate considering all the mud, I asked her what she was up to.
She told me that she was walking home to see her brother. Knowing he had a car, I couldn’t believe that she had let us be stuck without telling us of this option to leave. I asked if he could help us; she said no and left the house.
The children congregated around Damon and I as we tried to explain the plan. Damon stood on my left and I sank to my knees. I told them we had no food and no plan until the following day. I complained about no one wanting to save us. All of a sudden I looked up at Damon and told him I just realized we had missed our flight back to Fairbanks. I didn’t know if the airline would refund our tickets because of the catastrophe that was out of our control.
I turn my attention back to the children and apologized for whining to them.
Themes: Airplane/Airport
B and I were leaving the apartment for a few days. I put the dog in her kennel and handed the keys to our neighbor who was house sitting for us. Out in the parking lot, I realized I had forgotten something. I opened the door to my apartment and saw the neighbor lady sitting at our breakfast bar shuffling paperwork.
Behind her, I noticed Lacey running around the back yard with a toy bear in her mouth. I wondered why the dog was no longer in her kennel, but decided to not worry about it since the neighbor was supposed to be in charge of things.
I opened the door again and stepped from my apartment into another lady’s kitchen. She and a teen girl were sitting at the kitchen table filleting fish. The fish was long, skinny, and had white meat like a halibut. The two people were looking straight ahead at nothing while working with the fish meat.
The woman looked over at the teen, and I could tell the teen was blind. Because of her disability, she was unable to get all the meat from the skin in one swipe of the knife; the meat was coming off in small, random sections. I was worried that she was going to cut her fingers with the fillet knife.
Mom and I were at the store looking for bath stuff. All of the aisles had been moved around and had new items on the shelves. Everything was very interesting to look at, but the bath salts and scrub and stuff was nowhere to be found.
After walking past all of the linens and towels, I found the bath section; it was teeny tiny had barely had anything. I looked at the top shelf at all of the natural sea sponges, and told a little girl on my left that I needed a small non-sea sponge to put on my eyes at night. A store employee appeared on my right and told me that they were located in the previous aisle, when I had just been there and knew that, in fact, they weren’t.
Themes: Market
I am sitting in the middle of my Junior High School gymnasium during my High School graduation ceremony. I am sitting in the row against the back wall and notice that no one is wearing a gown. There ceremony finishes and we all stand up to cheer.
I turn to KatiAnn on my left and we embrace. I am so excited about graduating that I give her a kiss on the lips; she pulls away slightly disturbed but mostly confused. I turn to my right and give Izzy a big hug and a kiss on the lips.
Jon, sitting in the row in front of us, turns towards me eager for a hug and kiss: he manages to slip me his tongue. I pull away laughing, and tell him that he better watch out; if B finds out what he did, Jon will be in major trouble.
I lean behind Izzy and give Ryan a big hug as well. I tilt my head up to give him a kiss, but he is distracted and our lips barely touch. He lets go of me, turns from our group, and leaves the gym. I feel upset that he doesn’t care much about the group and me.
A band on stage starts playing and I make my way to the front of the gym. I am enjoying the music and really want to play my djembe with them.
I walk into the side aisle and bend down to unbuckle my heels. I am wearing a flowing skirt. I start toward the stage, but the band ends its set. I bend down and re-buckle my shoes. Someone then says how much I should play with the band and then the lead singer starts a song all by himself. I bend down and unbuckle my shoes.
When I stand back up, there is another percussionist on stage playing hand drums. She has short brown hair, is good on her drums, and has a wide variety of drums to play on. I bend down, buckle my shoes again, and go sit in the front row.
People then started screaming, “Fire!” I looked up as everyone was running towards the exits while the band played on. I got up and went to the main entrance in time to see the principal and teachers go outside and lock the doors, locking everyone inside with the fire.
I go back to my seat in the front row and pick up my djembe. My right arm is very stiff and I have problems using it to play. My left arm is relaxed and loose, but my right arm is so very tight. I feel frustrated that I cannot control my right arm.
I get up and see that the gymnasium is empty but for Jayme, Sarah, and me. I walk back to them and they ask me where their father, Dick, is. I hadn’t seen him.
Themes: Band
We were going to go for a drive in Heidi’s new white truck. When we got outside, Heidi told us that the starter was broken and so we couldn’t drive it.
Damon and B opened the hood and poked around inside to try and fix it. I stood over their right shoulders watching and saw a shiny new part around the engine: it was a brand new starter. I looked down and saw footprints that belonged to Jake Wise - he was the one who had fixed it.
We are all standing on the passenger’s side and go to get into the truck when Melissa asked me to get in on the driver’s side and sit by her. She is 5 years old, and I know that I am 8. I run around the truck and get in the back seat with her.
The inside of the vehicle is now my mom’s old red suburban - the vehicle she had when we were all younger. I am sitting in the middle of the center seat with young Melissa on my left and adult B on my right. Damon is sitting in the front passenger’s seat, Heidi in the middle of the front, and John is driving. John is clutching the wheel so tightly that I can see his knuckles turning white.
I keep my head turned to my right and try very hard to pay attention to what everyone is talking about. The conversation is so dull and adult-like that I turn left to Melissa. We giggle and laugh and ignore everyone else.
John parks the suburban in the middle of a forest and we all climb out. Damon leads the way on an unclear path. We go up and down numerous mogul-like hills that increase in size. The last one we come upon is a rather large hill: giant for a mogul. I decide to take a safer, easier route around the side instead of straight up to the top.
On the other side, I grab hold of a cliff ledge and inch my way across the cliff to the other side. I can see John, Heidi, Damon, B, and Melissa standing in a small circle talking on top of the cliff. Almost to the other side of the ledge, I watch Melissa come over to the edge 15 feet away from where I was.
The ground gives way and Melissa slides down the hill, barely catching herself in time. She hangs there struggling for some time until she manages to pull herself back up. As she runs back to the others, I think that I ought to have tried to help her instead of hanging on the edge of the cliff like I did watching her struggle.
The scene then replays itself: Melissa comes to the edge of the cliff, the ground slides away, and she hangs precariously on the cliff edge. This time I go over to her and help push her up. Certain she is now safe, I resume my journey to the other side.
Themes: Melissa
I walked through a large field, into a near empty warehouse, and then was in a large building. It was designed with a lot of beautiful wood: the floors, the grand staircase, and the banisters were all a dark, hard wood. It is either a school or mansion or place of business. I walk up a curved staircase to the second floor balcony overlooking the large foyer below.
Standing on top of a railing, I reach up and grab two gold and sienna elasticized cords with tassels on the ends and jump off of the balcony. The cords stretch and stretch, allowing me to make a graceful landing on the lower floor.
Just as I am setting my feet on the floor, two secretaries that look as though they stepped out of the sixties appear just beneath me. I drop right into their conversation and knock one of them over.
I release the two cords and turned to watch them spring back towards the ceiling. Nearly there, the tassels became entangled. I turned and saw a skinny man wearing a white dress shirt, a tied, and dark slacks. He was in charge, and I was in trouble for knotting the tassels.
He and I turn to exit the foyer - he is following me to make sure I untangle the cords. We walk through a pair of metal and glass doors, the kind often found in schools and school libraries. The doors open into a small arctic entryway and another set of doors.
B steps through the other doors and grabs me in a large, loving hug. He pressed me up against the wall and kisses my neck and ear. He grinds his pelvis into mine.
I glance to my right at the man who was following me and try to tell B to wait while I untangle the cords and tassels, but B doesn’t care. The man is staring at me, wanting me to hurry so he can get back to work, but all I can think about is the size of B’s penis pressed up against me.
I was fairly young and was with my dad and brothers on the beach. All of a sudden a bear comes running down the shoreline directly for us on two legs; it is holding two of its paws to its midsection and is losing a lot of blood. It turns for my dad and chases him into what was either a large ditch or small canal. My dad jumps over the ditch/canal and then we are sitting at my parents’ dining room table.
Themes: Dad